The holidays are usually a time to celebrate, relax, and embrace joy. However, it can also be a time for many where, instead of happiness and joy, there is more stress and difficulty in being happy. This can be especially true for those who feel there’s unrealistic expectations to attain perfection during the holidays and extra pressure to have fun.
If you’re already navigating mental health issues such as depression, sadness, loneliness, grief, and anxiety, these tend to all be magnified during this time of the year. Thankfully, there is hope. We have some tips and resources for managing mental health during the holidays. These can be referred to if you’re bracing yourself for a tough holiday season and are looking to get the right kind of help and support you need.
Tips for Navigating the Holidays
Taking care of your mental health during the holidays isn’t something we tend to think of during the chaos of preparing for its arrival. This is why it can help to have these reminders while you navigate your way through the holiday season.
Keep your routines: Holidays for some are physically and emotionally demanding. If you have a specific routine, try and stick to it as best as possible.
Stick to a good sleep schedule: The holidays are a good time to try and catch up on much needed sleep, if you’re able to go to bed earlier.
Fresh air: We get health benefits from nature even in the cold weather. Feel free to encourage a little walk with a friend for coffee, for example. Be sure to bundle up accordingly and stay safe.
Good eats: This is the time of year we tend to overindulge in tasty treats, which can and do affect our mood. Be sure to keep a good balance of treats with nutritional food, be mindful of what you eat, and practice other good habits such as savouring and enjoying holiday foods by chewing slowly.
Limit alcohol: This can be a slippery slope, especially during this time of year. Social gatherings can be tempting and make some feel pressured to partake. Setting a boundary and enforcing your limitation is key here.
Give yourself forgiveness: If your “guilt monster” comes knocking, don’t answer the door. Accept that no one is perfect. It’s okay if you overindulged, or stayed up too late, or made any kind of slip in your routine. It happens to everyone.
Do yourself a kindness: Examples can be a walk to your favourite coffee shop, taking a moment to meditate, listen to your favourite music, and read a book you’ve been meaning to read.
Give yourself compassion: We want love and acceptance from others, however it’s more important to be accepted by ourselves and show ourselves self-compassion. The holidays can be chaotic and some years will be more stressful than others. You may feel pressure to be happy, but it’s perfectly okay to have other feelings such as anger, sadness, anxiety, and frustration. You are not alone. Remember that many people are navigating this time of year just as you are.
Embrace rituals: Within your own comfort, of course. Embrace those silly holiday rituals your family has, or even start your own this year. Decorating, singing holiday songs, or volunteering can give you a sense of purpose and belonging.
Plan ahead for changes in routine to avoid surprises: When planning for social get togethers, family gatherings, etc., ask your host questions to know what to expect such as: How many people will there be? Who will be there? What is the schedule? Is there a quiet place where I can hangout if things become overwhelming? Is there a plan on how to get home (e.g. carpooling, cab fare, bus route and fares, etc.)?
Set and communicate clear boundaries: If you cope with depression or anxiety, accept it may be a challenge to participate in things the same way you may have done previously. By taking on so many social obligations, you burn yourself out before the holidays are even over. For example, if you become stressed out by too many social obligations and have trouble saying no, try saying something else instead such as: “I gave this some thought, and I will have to decline. Thank you for asking me and thinking of me. I appreciate the invite.” You deserve a chance to relax, rest, and recover.
Connect with others: Is there a friend or family member you haven’t spoken to in a while? Call them, email them, or send them a card. If it’s someone close by, now might be a good time to catch up.
Support others with acceptance and an open ear: It is not up to you to fix and solve other people’s problems. Here’s how you can support those you care about:
- Don’t criticize someone for feeling down.
- Don’t start trying to “cheer them up”.
- Listen to them.
- Accept and acknowledge their feelings.
- Be comfortable with silence; body language can show support.
Practice gratitude: We are conditioned to focus on what we don’t have rather than what we do have. Focusing on gratitude can break the materialistic cycle. Thinking of all the reasons you may have to be grateful, such as being here in the now, instead of focusing on an expensive gadget that’s being advertised all over social media. This can help give you better peace of mind.
It’s not about how much you spend: Never go into debt trying to get gifts for people during the holidays. It’s not worth it to you or your finances. The people who care about you will understand you’re not able to spend that kind of money on them. Homemade gifts are a great idea if you’re crafty, and it shows you’ve spent time and effort in making something special. Family gift exchanges can take pressure off; it can mean only getting 1 gift instead of an entire pile of them, and setting a cap on how much is spent means it’s fair for everyone. Happiness isn’t something that can be bought at a store. Don’t stress yourself out trying to shop for the perfect gift. Shop when you’re well rested; if you’re tired, you’re more likely to be impulsive.
Crisis resources in case you need them: Speak to your healthcare provider if you’re someone who is taking medication, and make sure you’ve got the proper doses and amounts needed to get through the holiday. Know your pharmacy hours and speak to your pharmacist in case of needing emergency refills. If a crisis happens during the holidays, speak to your healthcare providers ahead of time. They can let you know who might be available on-call, and they also may give you a list of crisis resources.
Resources For Urgent Mental Health Crises During the Holidays
Just in case your provider isn’t thorough with who you might need in the event of a crisis during the holidays, we’ve got you covered. If you’ve reached a place where you feel like you’re needing help during the holidays, please don’t hesitate to contact any of these resources. All of the helpline services are 24/7, unless otherwise noted.
Children & Youth
Kids Help Phone: 1-800-668-6868, Text #686868, or Live Chat
Youthdale: 416-363-9990
Good2Talk: 1-866-925-5454
LGBT YouthLine: 1-800-268-9688, Text 647-694-4275, or Chat (Sun-Fri 4PM-9:30PM)
Adults
Spectra Help Line (Cantonese or Mandarin): 289-569-1203 (Mon-Fri 10AM-10PM)
Toronto Distress Centre: 416-408-4357, Text 45645, or Chat (2PM-2AM).
Gerstein Centre: 416-929-5200.
Victim Services: 416-808-7066.
Assaulted Women’s Helpline: 1-866-863-0511, TTY 1-866-863-7868, Text #SAFE (#7233)
Toronto Rape Crisis Centre: 416-597-8808
Trans Life Line: 1-877-330-6366
Anishnawbe Mental Health Crisis Management Service: 416-891-8606
The Hope for Wellness Helpline: 1-855-242-3310, or live chat
Seniors
Toronto Seniors Helpline: 416-217-2077 or TTY 1-844-946-1700, (Mon-Fri 9AM-8PM; Sat-Sun & Holidays 9AM-6PM).
Single-Session Counselling (Virtual)
Woodgreen Community Services: Walk-In Counselling
Delivery: In-person on Tuesdays and virtually by phone or video on Wednesdays year-round (Tuesday and Wednesday evenings). Virtual Intake: (416) 645-6000 ext.1990. Call on Wednesdays between 4PM-6:15PM to book.
Family Services Toronto (Ages 18+): Single Session Virtual Counselling
Weekdays from 9AM-6PM, 416-595-9618.
Catholic Family Services: Online Quick Access Single Sessions
Call 416-921-1163 or 416-222-0048 and leave a message. A staff person will contact you.
“What’s Up” Youth Walk-In Clinic
OneStopTalk
1-855-416-8255. One Stop Talk operates Monday to Friday from 12PM-8PM, and Saturdays from 12PM-4PM.
Stella’s Place – Drop-In Virtual Counselling
Tuesdays and Thursdays 3PM-6PM. 416-461-2345, or email connect@stellasplace.ca.
At Hopewoods, we are here for you on your path to recovery. It gives us joy when we see or hear that our clients are happy and healthy, especially during the holiday season. While sadly that is not always going to be the case, the door is open to our community clinic for anyone who has not yet visited us before and needs help.
For those in our community, we extend our wishes to stay connected and please see us if you find yourself struggling this holiday season. If you have any questions regarding our psychotherapy sessions, assessments, or any services we offer, contact us today or book a free 30-minute consultation.
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