The holiday season is all about spending time with those we care about—something most of us have always believed. The traditions we follow during the holidays create a warm and cozy vibe every year, offering a sense of comfort and belonging. However, when life brings a major change—kids moving away, loved ones no longer being with us, a relationship ending, or even a family that can’t handle a full day of celebration anymore, recreating that warm holiday spirit can be tough.
Since holidays emphasize “time spent with loved ones,” they can be especially hard for those who are facing loss or other major change in life. Memories of joyful holiday moments can suddenly become reminders of what’s missing. Many people also feel guilty about wanting to take part in holiday traditions, knowing they’re celebrating without their loved ones.
To cope with a major change during the holidays, it’s important to recognize that things will never be the same as they were before. Accepting this truth allows you to feel the emotions that come with change and loss. Acknowledging these changes gives you the green light to have moments that might feel awkward, tough, or emotionally challenging. Acceptance helps you get ready for the holiday season by making specific plans and arranging the support you need to handle the changes.
Strategies for Coping with Major Changes During the Holiday Season
1. Set achievable expectations for yourself
Don’t fall into the trap of drowning yourself in a flurry of holiday prep to escape your feelings and avoid confronting the major changes. It’s like trying to keep a beach ball submerged underwater—it might work for a little while, but eventually, it will pop back up when you least expect it. Rather than overwhelming yourself with holiday tasks, figure out which of those tasks matter to you the most, then focus on activities that align with your priorities.
2. Be around people who care about you
Change and loss can make you feel isolated and unloved. This feeling can get worse if you spend too much time alone or convince yourself that you’re a burden to others. Being with those who care about you can lift your spirits and also give you a chance to support others who might be going through similar changes or losses.
3. Resist the urge to “cancel” the holiday, even if it’s tempting
If holiday activities feel too painful or overwhelming this year, consider scaling back instead of cancelling the holidays altogether. You could choose to do minimal decorations, skip sending out holiday cards, or limit how many parties you attend.
4. Sit with your emotions and experience them
Take a moment to reflect on your feelings and sit with them before sharing them with others. Share your feelings when you’re ready, and be open to letting others support you. You can also give your feelings a designated time and space to be expressed by participating in activities meant for that purpose.
5. Help others
Sometimes, the greatest comfort comes from giving to those around you. During times of loss or transition, doing things that feel meaningful can become even more important. Think about how you want to impact the world around you and take steps to do so. When you lend a hand to others, you might find yourself as enriched as those you assist.
6. Prioritize your well-being
Try to avoid using alcohol to cope with your feelings. Make sure you’re getting enough rest, eating well, and carving out time for yourself. Share your memories with others. Engage in physical activity to help manage your feelings. Find healthy ways to express your emotions each day.
7. Establish new traditions or rituals that suit your current circumstances
As a family, talk about the activities you want to include or leave out this year. New traditions and rituals could involve:
- Doing something in honour of a loved one who has passed away
- Starting a new family tradition
- Volunteering or donating to charity
- Creating a fresh menu for holiday feasts
- Inviting friends over
The key takeaway is that there’s no right or wrong way to celebrate the holidays. Each person’s journey through the holidays will be distinct. What’s truly important is to be present and fully engage in your experience during this holiday season.
Seek Professional Support When Needed
Sometimes, major life shifts can seem too much to handle on your own. If you’re finding it tough to deal with the emotions that come with these changes, it’s worth reaching out to a professional for support. For example, if you’ve recently experienced the loss of a loved one, getting in touch with a therapist can be an excellent way to navigate your grief and find support.
A professional psychotherapist can provide you with tools and techniques to help you manage stress and gain a better understanding of your emotions. They can also guide you as you navigate challenging feelings such as anxiety or sadness within a safe environment to share your thoughts.
At Hopewoods, we believe that therapy should equip you with practical skills to tackle life’s hurdles. Significant life changes can feel daunting, but they also pave the way for personal growth. If you would like support navigating a major change in your life, we’re here to help. Book a free 30-minute consultation with us today, or contact us directly if you have any questions about our services.
